Walking with an Ikigai
( I suggest you listen to the audio after reading this post)
I’ve just woken up from a lovely dream. I was in a favourite garden with all my friends. The sun was shining, and people were enjoying themselves. People I cared about were laughing, eating, and celebrating something good. The energy was high and the feeling was good. Life felt great and with lots of meaning and connections.
I come back to the present moment. It’s raining again, with the usual grey skies this summer is giving us. Once upon a time, this weather would have sent my spirits spiralling but no longer. I lay in silence listening to the rain and my energy is high and I feel such a sense of gratitude because of where I had just been in that dream. I thank the Universe for the life I have now and the people in it.
Every day I wake up I feel the same. Waking up and then getting up was once difficult for me. When you are in the grip of deep depression everything is weighed down by treacle, a heavy force that keeps you trudging through life. It’s exhausting; your senses are numbed and your energy is almost empty.
That has all been flipped on its head. It took years, about three amazing pieces of luck or miracles. However you wish to look at it, for me to arrive here where I am today, I have truly found my Ikigai.
Let me introduce you to the book ‘Ikigai- The Japanese Secret to a long and happy life.’ This work researches the human experience but crucially what it takes to live a long and happy life. This post is not a book review, this would almost miss the point. Instead, I want to digger deeper as to why having an Ikigai (a purpose for living) is so powerful.
I was talking about retirement recently and what that looks and feels like to the individual. There is a huge amount of evidence to say that retiring isn’t a positive thing to do, quite the opposite. I think we can all recall hearing of how one person retires one week, and they are dead by the next. Then we can look at the examples of working until you are in your 90s with such a powerful sense of purpose, Sir David Attenborough springs to mind and you might want to read the example I give here.
It depends on what you mean by retirement. To have liberation from having to work for money is an absolute gift that most of us would admit is one goal we would like to aspire to. To have a pension or passive income streams are two such golden gateways to freedom of time.
One marker of wealth is to have the freedom to choose what you do with your day according to Morgan Housel in his book ‘The Psychology of Money’, which I am now reading. Freeing up time gives you the space to think about the activities you do that give you the most pleasure. However, what truly is the driver of longevity isn’t about pursuits of pleasure but activities which give contribution, growth, service and a sense of community.
The book Ikigai can be summarised in the following ways:
1) People who enjoy the longest and happiest lives have a strong sense of purpose.
2) Their relationships with people within their families and communities are high.
3) They move daily, and their lives are busy and full. Often their exercise is not intense but prolonged with gardening high on their list of activities as they grow their own food.
4) They eat a diet largely based on fruit and vegetables, protein and reduced meat consumption.
5) They practice Eastern traditions of gentle movements, including Tai Chi and meditation.
6) They find a state of steady focus and flow in everything they do.
7) They have learnt the art of resilience and managing stress.
The researchers of this book interviewed people from all over the world and named five areas called Blue Zones where the population had all these traits.
They are: ( the audio quotes the precise reasons behind each area. Forgive me for the pronunciation if it’s said not quite correctly)
1) Okinawa, Japan,
2) Sardinia, Italy
3) Loma Linda, California
4) The Nicoya Peninsula, Costa Rica
5) Ikaria, Greece.
Going back to the day job, the book breaks down Ikigai into four areas which are placed into overlapping circles. This is the opportunity to ask yourself where you sit within these circles and to be honest with the answers. It also allows you to ask some further questions. These could be challenging for you if you don’t want to hear the answers you give back to yourself.
Look at these categories:
Passion: what you love
Mission: what the world needs
Vocation: What you can be paid for
Profession: What you are good at.
To have all four of these is truly I believe the elixir to life, the Holy Grail and the running water that quenches your deepest desires. To have a job that embraces all these things is the greatest gift you can give to yourself and the world. It doesn’t have to be all paid work either, serving a church community or voluntary work are all valuable and many people interviewed in the book did such community work.
Sadly, many people are forced into the fast lane, a world where money has to be King because of the cost of living and because we are taught by the news and social media to compare, envy and feel dissatisfied when we think we fall short. This drives us into jobs we hate just for money, getting stuck on a treadmill of existence and getting by. The rinse and repeat of getting up on a Monday morning and knowing that you must do it all over again with no end in sight.
But what if you could break free from that?
It’s not easy but the subtle shift has to start with you. One leap of faith, one action, one opportunity, one new habit and one sprinkling of hope are the keys which can unlock many doors.
One of the most influencing things about pain is it is one of the mightiest and strongest forms of good. It is an emotion you never forget, but if you can move away from it ( knowing the energy and courage it took to move away from it) this will never leave you. I’m not talking about the pain of grief and losing a loved one here. That’s a different type of pain. I am talking about the pain within yourself because of the need for change.
I remember my greyest of days back in the winter of 2010. I asked myself what had I done to have ever deserved this. I felt pity towards myself. Pity is the most wretched feeling in the world, and I believe the worst feeling of all. At that crossroads you have a choice, give up, or carry on. I looked around me and went outside. I pulled up a weed and then another one. It was the start of a long journey that has me writing here today, doing what I do. My Ikigai has never been more powerful.
Was it hard to change my world? Yes, there are no shortcuts. Did I have setbacks? Yes, many. Did I have breakthroughs through consistent effort and the drive to keep going? Yes, and when they came, they tasted like the sweetest of honey. Did I lift myself out of depression? Yes, but depression is like a healed scar. You are vulnerable and you know when you must put on the brake to put in some self-care. There is always a risk you could end up back in the treacle and not the honey. I am determined never to be in the vat of treacle ever again.
It’s 09.00, the rain has stopped, and the day is starting. I’m thankful and glad to be alive ( see last week’s post) and I want to live a long time because there is much I have missed out on and still much to do. I will be sharing more about how I am trying to keep physically as healthy as possible, but I do believe health starts in the mind.
As one of the greatest mentors in human growth and development, Jim Rhon once said,
“When your why is big enough, you will find a way to know the how.”
Until next week…..
References:
@ Audio Extract from Chapter one ‘ The Art of Staying Young While Growing Old’, page 12 of ‘Ikigai, The Japanese Secret to a Long and Happy Life,’ Hector Garcia, Francesc Miralles, Penguin Random House, UK 2016
Here is a link to the book itself.
